Patrick Connors,

It took oh so long to get myself straight
Doubtfulness delaying all the right things
Herbal teas, mysticism, oral fixations
Wise words written by those from before me

Take lots of advice, some good, some not;
Whatever you do don’t try to heal too fast
Except if you accept or grin and bear it
Growth and change are inevitable

Played the fool by truth that was yet not truth
No one will take pity on feeble attempts
Such contrived representations: unless you
Want them to, and you don’t want them to

Picked myself up and dusted myself off
Chose to contradict - to deny my demise
Sang my song out loud without audience or reason
Smiled and laughed and reveled in it all

Ready to live for the here and what’s next
Forsake the past, the need to make right by
Fulfilling adolescent fantasies
Made of cathartic Hollywood endings

I had to look within while I was doing without
We all need to find one another but
The key to my recovery lay in
The discovery of what makes me, me

Author Statement

Poetry is healing. It legitimizes my personal experience, and makes me part of the universal conversation with every single person who can relate at all to what I’m talking about. My poetic expression gives me the courage to forgive myself for being hurt, and to forgive anyone who has hurt me. If my art inspires anybody, if it empowers one person to continue on their own journey of healing, then I know I have done something worthwhile.


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The Gatehouse