A constant dark cloud looms over my head.
Everyone tells me to forgive and forget. How do I do that when my childhood and innocence were stolen from me? I become an adult before I was able to be a child.
I cry but no tears.
I am in pain though no ones notices.
Alone all the time in my mind.
Once the abuse happened, the secret followed me like a dark shadow.
I go through the motions of life. What an unhappy and angry existence like being trapped down among the dead men in that dark deep hole.
Arises a twinkle of light.
Come down light in the night.
What’s it like in the light?
When all I do is walk in the rain.
Cold and lonely.
Wasted days.
Wasted years.
It really feels like hell.
Done my time in hell!
Done my time feeling out of place.
The walls are coming down.
My awakening beckons to me.
With help, my journey from the darkness begins.
It won’t be easy, but better than it was.
Robert McDonald, Uxbridge Canada
Author Statement
I was inspired to write the poem entitled “Darkness” as a testament of my healing journey. The process of writing is another healing modality which is therapeutic to me. I hope my poem touches someone else.
The meaning of the poem entitled “Darkness” embodies the loneliness, shame, anger, resentment and internal pain from my childhood throughout adulthood until I sought help. I am no longer a victim I am a warrior – a true survivor!
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