Written by: The Gatehouse

Beloved friend, fellow survivor,
I thought I heard you say,
“My innocence is forever lost.”
Look again, look deeply, I say.

Beyond existence and non-existence.
Beyond birth and beyond death,
Thus is your nature.
Look again, look deeply, I say.

Taking refuge in Great Compassion,
Transform pain into joy,
Awaken gladness in your heart.
Look again, look deeply, I say.

Close your eyes and look inward,
Into the depths of consciousness.
There you find a sweet child.
Say to her, “Darling, I am here for you.”

Open you heart to this child,
Allow great compassion to arise,
Offer the incense of tranquility.
Say to her, “Darling, I see your suffering.”

Say to her with tenderness,
“Sweet child, little me,
A cloud never dies.
Innocence is your nature.”

The insight is strong,
Be brave and be bold.
And thus the wisdom lotus blossoms,
In the thick, stagnant mud.

Darling, I am here for you.
Beloved, I see you.
Fellow survivor, nothing is lost.
We are blessed innocence.

Stigma will no longer sew my lips shut, it cannot.

Stigma will no longer shame me into a shell, it cannot.

Stigma is the toxin that runs through society, but no longer through me. It cannot.

Stigma is the faceless fear that tried to force me into inaction. But now, it cannot.

Stigma helped my perpetrator get away with his crime, but now, it cannot.

Stigma helped complicit institutions cover up abuse, but now, it cannot.

Stigma is being disrupted and dismantled, and it will no longer prevent the truth.

Stigma is being unmasked and uncovered, and it will no longer trap any youth.

Stigma is a relic of the past, showing the greatest contrast.

For now, the darkness cannot live here, only truth and light.

the same way
i count my thoughts
in shapes
& constellations
strung together
one too many times.

my love for you tastes like
arriving home from a blizzard,
your defrosted lips
fireplace hands
stoking our coals into embers

We change, turn over covers and apple strudels.
We wake, fresh out the oven.
We grow meeting seasons with new energy.

Be a tree.
We do not know why we are here.

Neither do trees.

Purpose lives, breathes, shakes our cores, spirits, and psyches.

I was blessed with a body, arms that wrap around my community, hands that are warm
and I whistle wind songs, chiming tunes, writing rhythms extending towards you.

I am resilient. I am unique. I am unconventional. I am authentic.

Trees cannot be replicated as replacement carries new weight, manufacturing wisdom
in my palms, reaching up, grounding myself in moss and stone and cement.

No matter where I go, I leave a mark.

One human thumbprint
is worth more
Than a thousand.

Learn
To be
Forgiving

An open cloud
Welcoming a rainbow
Still rising
After every storm

Through lighting
Quaking earth
Fear and failure
Stay in the sky

Come nightfall
Spread thin
Straying into morning
Accept the sun

Glide ahead
Through strikes
Not hiding
Only releasing

A cloud
Always changing
Never ceasing
Its softness on dark days

Learn
To be
Forgiving

We drift together
2 beings coasting along the horizon of our thoughts.
I feel you caress my lips and bathe my body in sparkles.
Ocean whispers lullaby’s to skies on blue afternoons
when I’m swimming on the shoreline in Paradise, Cabbage, Goodman’s Beach.
My feet sink beneath the comfort of your reach, comforting, gritty, and rough and soft
in spaces I do not expect.
I am happy to see you,
even when you taste like oranges and salt.
I am one being melting into the universe.
I accept you, sunset, sunrise,

meditation among grandmother moon’s loving gentle storm.
Like her, I am shy and when moon beams or sparkles meet my eyes
I show a new aspect of me.
I am a sliver one day, fully blossoming the next.
Human beings are as mystical as weatherscapes.

I adore catching glimpses of you.
I appreciate your illusions, miracles, and consequences. Everything about you
intrigues me.

I breath solace
Tasting flurries of foam
Fantasizing of feathers
Caressing the water
Cleansing, I am here
This moment turns
Grey stones into safe spaces
Contemplating nothing
Enjoying my pencil tracing
Over my pages in the books
Carrying across the next moment

Until tomorrow,
Friend.

It took oh so long to get myself straight
Doubtfulness delaying all the right things
Herbal teas, mysticism, oral fixations
Wise words written by those from before me

Take lots of advice, some good, some not;
Whatever you do don’t try to heal too fast
Except if you accept or grin and bear it
Growth and change are inevitable

Played the fool by truth that was yet not truth
No one will take pity on feeble attempts
Such contrived representations: unless you
Want them to, and you don’t want them to

Picked myself up and dusted myself off
Chose to contradict - to deny my demise
Sang my song out loud without audience or reason
Smiled and laughed and reveled in it all

Ready to live for the here and what’s next
Forsake the past, the need to make right by
Fulfilling adolescent fantasies
Made of cathartic Hollywood endings

I had to look within while I was doing without
We all need to find one another but
The key to my recovery lay in
The discovery of what makes me, me